NO CARRY-ONS ALLOWED on THE PEACE TRAIN!

As I ran up to THE PEACE TRAIN, I noticed a door with my name above it! How exciting! This must be where I get on – “PEACE, HERE I COME!”

For some reason, when I attempted to step aboard through the doorway to my PEACE, I was stopped dead in my tracks.  As I stepped back to examine the door more closely, I noticed that the door frame to my peace was exactly the shape of my body… and placed upon that frame was a small sign that read,

NO CARRY-ONS ALLOWED. Leave your baggage at the door.

 

I have had great successes in life – going in both directions – up and down. And through it all, on the rides upward as well as the rides downward, I finally figured out that the secret to maintaining my peace came when I was able to let go. I have now learned to be quite masterful in maintaining my peace – even during some of my darkest moments.

I have come to know that, He who lives with the most peace wins!

Even when people were “taking” things away from me, things of great value to me, they did not take my peace when I chose to let those things go. I become happier because nothing was “taken” from me.

If you freely give it away, then nothing is actually taken from you. 

You only feel like a victim when you are trying to hold onto what was taken. You can choose to no longer be a victim of the crime if you choose to see yourself as letting it go and you no longer hold onto itit is gone, so let it go free. Even if it was rightfully yours, letting it go gives YOU peace. If you choose to become happier because of letting it go – you win.

“He who lives with the most peace wins!”

The key to maintaining your peace is LETTING GO, period. Letting go of things that no longer serve you has a magical effect upon your entire being.

Let it go. Let it go. Let it go. (sung to the tune of Let it Snow)

…and you will find your peace.

let it go let it go let it go

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MASTER of my peace

I have lost THREE businesses, for three different reasons, and through it all I maintained my peace. Even though some would look at these as failures, I look at them as winnings (yes, seriously). The immense power of peace in your life is priceless. You may have lost everything, or in my case nearly everything, but if you hold onto your peace – you win.

He who lives with the most peace wins!

Candle Company #1 early/mid 1990’s Design Initiative Group/DIG/DigWARE/DigGlo: We grew to moderate success selling to up market stores such as Neiman’s, middle market stores such as Urban Outfitters and mass market stores such as Clair’s Boutiques. We had enough success that the government gave us a Small Business loan for $350,000 to help us expand. Within a year of the loan, I was notified by my business partner that he was taking actions that would close the doors to our candle company. I was overwhelmed with fear. I know what the onset of a deep depression feels like…I couldn’t pull myself from bed for a couple of days. I woke up one morning, stood up and said, “I am turning this into THE BEST THING that could have ever happened FOR ME!” And that I did.  FIVE and ½ weeks later, I was up and running with a new candle company.

Candle Company #2 1998 Er’go Candle: It was with this company that I helped introduce Soy Candles to the nation by marketing nationally to the upper-end gift and spa industries. At the pinnacle of our success, I was featured on CNN during Prime Time, News Night with Aaron Brown in a piece on up-and-coming entrepreneurs, called ON THE RISE. Sitting there that night, watching CNN, at what was the height of my personal success, an event that should have brought me great joy, I knew in my heart it was the beginning of the end. I am a very positive person, but in this case it was my gut talking.

My name and image was becoming important for the brand (think, Colonel Sanders and KFC). Though this exact scenario was my vision for the brand, it wasn’t the image held by a group of my investors, a family who happened to own the majority of the shares. I knew that evening, while watching CNN, that group of investors could not allow this to happen. If my name and image became too interwoven within the brand, they might lose some control. Approximately 3 months later I was voted out of my company.

Several days after I was voted off my Island, I took a week long cruise to clear my head and receive inspiration. And I did exactly that by staying PRESENT on that cruise and not spending ANY time on what had just transpired. I also knew that I didn’t want to create what I was going to do next from my mind, but instead be inspired from my inner spirit – for that reason I did not spend ANY time trying to figure out what I was going to do next. The trick, I had learned over the years of creating from my inner spirit, is to remain PRESENT in the MOMENT during these times of inspiration and let go of the past and don’t worry about the future. On the last day of that cruise, it was as if an information bubble encapsulated me with the full concept for my new company. And yet again,  5 and ½ weeks after I stepped off the cruise ship I was up and running with a new candle company. (I’m not sure why with both businesses it took exactly 5 ½ weeks to get them going, but that is amazingly what happened.)

Candle Company #3 2005 Jimmy Belasco Soy Candles: With this company, in the 5.5 weeks it took to put everything together, we also happened to design packaging that won Best New Product Packaging for our category (candles/fragrance/bath & body) at the NY International Gift Fair. We began to experience some moderate success when, in the early months of 2008, the bottom fell out of the US economy. With the drop in the economy along with some poor timing on decisions made in the months earlier, my company started to bleed money. Over the next few years, I experienced the collapse of my business. After completely exhausting all of my resources (financially, physically, spiritually & emotionally) I licensed my brand to a larger candle company in the beginning of 2011. After a year, I finally decided to call it quits – there was not more peace, love or joy in that business for me.

At the end of each of these businesses, for the most part, I maintained my peace. I usual choose to look at these sorts of tumultuous events as happening FOR ME, for my highest good… instead of TO ME or against me.   In the first two businesses at the very end, if I had spent ANY time regretting the past I would not have been focused enough to start an entirely new company in FIVE and half weeks. In each instance, in just over ONE month, I was able to create a new company, develop a full collection of fragrances, design new packaging, have samples of the new packaging produced, design and print new catalogs and have it all set up in showrooms across the country in the 6 major markets! All of that, plus a whole lot more in FIVE and a HALF WEEKS! It still amazes me that I was able to that, TWICE!

The ONLY way this was possible is because I stayed PRESENT IN THE MOMENT. I had to let go of my past and focus upon my present moment if I wanted to succeed in launching those candle lines. I am not Superman, in fact I am rather normal. What I am good at is remaining focused on the present and letting go of the past. By me letting go, I was able to maintain my peace. Because I was at peace during the process, I was able to accomplish some amazing things in a very short period of time.

Letting go is your key to peace. There is much power in a person who is able to maintain their peace.

He who lives with the most peace wins!

Let it go. Let it go. Let it go. (sung to the tune of Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow)

If you look at the case of candle company #2, technically, they walked away with the business I created, but I walked away with my peace. In this case I feel happy because I gained a level of peace in the process that I might not have been able to if the circumstances hadn’t played out as they did. This is why in the middle of a tumultuous situation I try not to judge the events as “bad”… they simply “are what they are“. I see these events as something that will end up for my highest good. It has sometimes been difficult to see things this way when the sh#t is hitting the fan, but I have had enough experience to know and trust that it can be the BEST thing that could happen… as long as I continue to keep that point of view. And trust me, because I know for myself, if you think it is the worst thing that could happen to you, you will also end up being right.

 

This universe is a magical place, whichever direction you choose in life; life is happy or life is sad, Life is good or life is bad… you will ALWAYS be right!

let it go let it go let it go

peace, love, jimmy

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a fish named FRED

A fish named Fred

There once was a fish named Fred who lived in the ocean.  Fred would often hide in the darkest underwater cave. When Fred was in that cave he would feel lonely and separate from all the other sea creatures in the ocean. When Fred was out swimming in the ocean he would notice all of the differences between him and all of the other creatures of the sea; by doing so he would feel even more separate… and alone. Even when Fred was in a school, surrounded by a multitude of other fish, he felt separate and alone.

What Fred didn’t realize was, it is impossible for him to be separate from the ocean, it is impossible for Fred to be separate from all the other creatures in the ocean. Fred and all the other creatures are all living in the same fish bowl. Every part of that ocean flows through each of these creatures. There is only a temporary perceived “separation” with all that is in that ocean.

And one day the fish named Fred became lunch for a larger fish named Bill. It was then that the fish named Fred finally realized his oneness with all there is in that ocean. In that moment Fred wished he had figured this out earlier… so he would not have felt all alone for all of those years. He realized that through his perceived separateness, he could learn about his true oneness with all things… though, in this case he was a little too late.

Hello Fred… and wake up before its too late.

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good VIBRATIONS

If you have a row of tuning forks, each of different notes, all lined up together and you were to introduce a duplicate of one of these forks and activate it with a thud of your hand – you would soon notice that one of the forks that is lined up will also begin to vibrate and sing…and all of the others will sit still and silent. When you look more closely, you will notice that the one that is now singing along will be of the same note to which your hand activated fork is tuned; they are both tuned to the same frequency.

 

Matching frequencies will find each other and begin to resonate with each other.

 

Everything we can see and not see in this universe is a vibration… waves of energy. Everything from the colors we see with our eyes, the thoughts we think with our mind, the feelings we feel within our hearts, the planet beneath our feet, the sun up in the sky to the stars throughout our universe – all of these are waves of vibratory energy.

 

Our experiences in this life are all based upon vibrations and frequencies; and our thoughts and feelings are the most powerful frequencies we have in creating our life experiences. Your life experience will only be that of which you are vibrating, or in this case thinking and feeling…and can be nothing other.

 

You cannot make the other forks in the line sing along with your frequency if they don’t match with your frequency.

 

If you are not pleased with the life frequency you are experiencing, then change your frequency to that of the life experience you wish to experience. Once you begin to vibrate at a different rate, you will automatically draw to you the matching vibrations, or frequencies…or life experiences. Use the vibrations you have at your disposal – your thoughts and your feelings and begin to think and feel your way to a new frequency.

 

And the wonderful part of all of this – only you can choose which frequency you wish to vibrate. You have your power of choice. Please use it mindfully.

 

“Everything is energy and that’s all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want and you cannot help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy. This is physics.” – Albert Einstein

 

“Imagination is everything; it is the preview of life’s coming attractions.” – Albert Einstein

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uploading my entries

Today ajimmy at 6 flaGSnd over the weekend I will be consolidating several posts from my other blogs onto this one – so you will think I am a posting fool. Jimmy’s Journal is supposed to be the centralized blog that maintains all the posts from my other blogs…and that just hasn’t happened lately… so I will attempt to bring it up to date over the next few days.

 

thank you, Jimmy

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The journey to loving myself: Part 2

Please begin with:  Part 1 

“Fat?! And you thought you were fat? You wanna see fat?! I’ll show you some fat!”

This was the adult me talking to the me in the pictures of when I was younger. I really wasn’t fat at all, maybe a little pudgy in some of the pictures; and by no means was my body the abhorrent image I remember holding in the mind’s eye of my youth.

It wasn’t always like this. Prior to the H-Bomb being dropped upon my psyche that fateful day in the boys department of Muirhead’s Department Store (see part 1), my earliest memories are of being surrounded by girls and woman at church as they are gawking and pulling at me, pinching my cheeks and going on and on about how cute I was and how beautiful my long white/blonde eyelashes were.

Jimmy baby in chair

There was so much adulation heaped upon me that when I was 5 years old I cut off my eyelashes thinking it would make them all stop pawing at me. I was wrong; it only fueled them more. You would think that a young boy growing up with all of that positive attention toward his cuteness would build a strong self image and a strong sense of self worth.

Jimmy 6 yrs

What happens to a child when a great portion of his self worth is built upon being cute? And what happens when he then grows out of his cuteness, and instead is labeled something horrible, such as HUSKY? I’ll tell you; I began to judge my body as imperfect, not cute and not lovable. I began to feel  unworthy of physical love.

Luckily for me, at a young age I knew I possessed the ability to make people laugh, and that gave me enough confidence to carry me through. But as far as my body was concerned, I felt less than; I felt unworthy.

This sense of physical unworthiness drove me to work hard on my body, trying to make it worthy. Through my teens and into young adulthood I would work out sometimes 6-7 days a week…. and I remained unworthy.

Worthy, in my mind’s eye, was an image of physical perfection; an airbrushed image of the perfect body. I remember staring in the mirror, with disgust, thinking, “How could someone love this body?” The sick part to this is, at one point, I was staring at a body in the mirror that looked like a slightly softer (not as cut) version of Mark Wahlberg’s famous Calvin Klein ad.

Because I could not love my body, I was incapable of allowing someone else to love me or my body. It wasn’t until recently that I realized that this physical unworthiness that I held onto for so long was the impetus for the destruction of many of my relationships.

The odder piece of this puzzle is that it took me getting completely out of shape, 50+ lbs fatter than my most fit body, in order to begin loving myself and my body.

It was during the darkest period of my entire life, My Dark Period, as my friends would call it (2008-2011), that I purposefully began the journey to loving myself. The events that lead to this dark period created the space into which I began to heal my life. Though this was THE most painful period of my life, and I hope to never experience anything like it again, I am thankful now that it all occurred as it did.

Because I began to love myself and I did not give up on life… my life is now the most peaceful it has ever been. Because I began to love my body… I am healthier than I have been in decades. And because I began to love my body and I did not give up on love… I met the absolute love of my life.

To be continued. (click here for Part 3)

In Part 3 I will go into the events that began My Dark Period and I will explain what I did to turn things around for myself.

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The journey to loving myself: Part 1

The dropping of the H-Bomb.

As I stood there, my mind exploded with images of how great I would look in my new clothing as I strutted down the hallway, flashing people the peace sign, on my way to my classroom on that first day of school. Every head would turn and gasp in awe of my grooviness!

My dream had finally come true!

Before me stood rack after groovy rack of the most spectacular clothing I have ever seen in person. And they were mine for the choosing! This clothing was every bit as exciting as I imagined possible from what I had seen on TV, especially The Jim Nabors Hour. That Gomer Pyle could sing and he wore the coolest clothes.

Because we were the poor preacher’s kids, the Muirhead’s (members of our church when my dad preached in Dearborn, who owned a very high end department store) invited us to come to their store and each pick out 2-3 outfits before school started. Dreamy-eyed and jumping for joy (in my head), I stood in awe with my mom in the Boy’s Clothing department at the opulent Muirhead’s Department Store in Dearborn Michigan. 

As I stood there contemplating which of these wonderful outfits I would try on first I heard something through the purple haze of my glory… 

“Excuse me ma’am…”

                                      “Mom! Isn’t this clothing amazzz………..”

 “… you seem to be in the wrong section…” 

(audible screeching halt)

                          “What?!” 

I snapped my head around just in time to witness as this very tall, very well dressed sales woman (yes, that is what we used to call them) paused just long enough to look over her shoulders, in either direction. I guess she was checking to see if the coast was clear for what she was about to do.

“Ahem, you see ma’am, this section is for…  slim boys

Then, in a tone as if she was speaking of a horrible and unthinkable disease, and ever so slightly more maliciously, as if she knew she was about to drop the H-bomb on a little boys heart, she uttered,

“… your boy is…     obviously,      HUSKY.” 

 

As the mushroom cloud was forming above my head, and before I could completely comprehend what exactly just happened, she flipped and turned to lead us to the department especially assigned for my “type”.

I remember vividly taking the long walk of shame to the dark, rear corner of the boys department as I was placed in front of the ugliest rack of beige clothing I have ever seen.

The letters of the sign hanging over the one, singularly sad rack of clothing, designed especially for fat little boys like me, simply read for the entire world to see, in big fat, chunky bold letters – HUSKY BOYS.

 

My life was over.

                                              “HUSKY?!?!

                                                           “obviously!?!?

It was official. At 11:28 am on August 11th, in the year 1971, at the age of 7:

I was fat unlovable…and obviously not worthy of groovy clothing.

 

This moment in time forged the basis for my self image that would follow me for the rest of my life into adulthood.  

…to be continued.  (click here for part 2)

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